


A Most Remarkable Message

by LadyofMisrule



Category: Sherlock Holmes & Related Fandoms, Sherlock Holmes - Arthur Conan Doyle
Genre: M/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2015-10-23
Updated: 2015-10-23
Packaged: 2018-04-27 16:00:33
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 348
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/5054953
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/LadyofMisrule/pseuds/LadyofMisrule
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Fic tag for Katie Forsythe's "Twelfth Night," from Watson's line: "[...] Hand me the telegraph forms, I've worked out the message in my mind.  'To Inspector G. Lestrade.  Re: sodomy.  Does Sherlock Holmes strike you as a man whose personality would materially benefit from taking it up the--'"</p>
<p>My ficlet written in speculation of how events would have played out had such a telegram actually been sent.</p>
            </blockquote>





	A Most Remarkable Message

**Author's Note:**

  * Inspired by [Twelfth Night](https://archiveofourown.org/external_works/151540) by Katie Forsythe. 



One morning, in the offices of Scotland Yard, Inspector G. Lestrade was reading from a small pile of telegrams when he happened upon It. It looked and felt like any other telegram, but the reading of it Lestrade found to be a unique experience indeed, for, immediately upon comprehending its contents, the inspector emitted a strangled sort of giggle-sob before abruptly vomiting all over an adjacent piece of furniture, which proved to be Gregson's desk.

By the time Gregson had recovered from his momentary shock and begun to glare murderously at Lestrade, the latter man had somehow--that is to say, even he himself cannot recall how--managed to gather enough wits to secret the offending telegram away in his pocket. Blaming his outburst on his breakfast--bad eggs this morning, have to speak to the housekeeper, can't have these things happening on a regular basis, can we now?--Lestrade hurried away to occupy himself with something--anything--to take his mind off of the telegram's contents. Fortunately this was not difficult, as Scotland Yard is a busy place and the inspector was not in possession of a terribly vivid imagination. The telegram in question was soon joined by other detritus and thrown into a wastecan at the end of the day, whence it came to be incinerated without reaching any other pairs of eyes.

Lestrade did have the hiccoughs for the rest of the day, but on the other hand Gregson stopped speaking to him for a week, which was a marked improvement. By the time he met with Sherlock Holmes again, the telegram had been put almost completely out of Lestrade's mind, remaining only as a sense that Mr. Holmes was a bit out of the ordinary, a bit "off," probably in a less than admirable way--which sense was about on par with Lestrade's usual perception of the man, and soon faded into the background of his thoughts. Thus it was that our friend of the official force did not come to any lasting harm as a result of his receiving such a remarkable message.


End file.
